You’re right some of the latest generation of plastic pitches aren’t bad at all, most have loads more “give” in them than ever before. Around half the sides in the Spanish non league division my team plays in have artificial surfaces. Many of the others have natural grass that resembles Roland Garros because of, as you say, the hostile climate. Another thing with an artificial surface is there is no chance of gouging out a divot big enough to go putting on, so the performance of the ball is always consistent.

AGPs are the future for developing countries in hostile climates and amateur clubs and communities who struggle with the high cost of maintaning decent natural grass pitches.

If you can’t play on a top-clss 3G AGP, you can’t play – play pub football instead.